Mommy and Sarah if God made us, who made God?

I spent yesterday and well into last night on an amusement park bender with a friend of mine, her 4 year old daughter Aaliyah, and her 5 year old niece Gabby. Lines, rides, long lines, more rides, fried dough, a few tears, three changes of clothes, two 10 dollar light sabers, and two tired grown-ups. I figured we would have been out of there by 8pm at the latest. We tore the two party girls from their third round in line for the Carousel at 9:30pm. They cried and yelled Pre-K obscenities, at both of us. At that point, they were both scooped up, tears, light sabers and all and carried back to the car. We strapped the poor under-entertained, under-loved children into the backseat, swords in hand and all was quiet. Finally. Read more »

5 year-old runs away from daycare to Hooters!

Poor stupid Asian kid :(

Some Asian child named Burrito above.

This is amazing. Kids are sort of asked to figure out if Asian kids are actually smarter. Obvi, they are. And obvi Mexican kids are stupid. More obviously they are the only two nationalities that exist.

Describing Carlos the math wiz- “I think Carlos is Asian at heart.”

Talking to the stupid Asian kid- “Are you really Asian?”

Stupid Asian kid’s response-”They expect me to be smart. Even if, like, I do everything wrong on purpose, they still copy off of me — as if I’m right just because I’m Asian.”

Hahahahaha this is amazing.

This little girl is my hero

How many times have to tried to stick your hand up into one of those stuffed animal claw machines?

This little girl next level.

Watch me crank that honor roll.

Smart Shorties just killed Schoolhouse Rock in the talent show. This is a-freaking-mazing. Kids are throwing numbers on everything.

If you stare at the page long enough, it will play the all these songs. These versions are better than some of the real tracks. I am seriously debating about purchasing this. Numbers just got cool. I feel smarter from listening to this.

This is why, this is why, this is why I’m Smart.