Issue #8

Wet & Wildin’: Missbehave’s Guide to Promiscuity

Winter is garbage. Christmas presents are fun, but trudging in Timbs, enfolded in an amorphous bubble goose for 5 months out of the year is insufferable. So when snow melts, pollen thickens the air, and you’ve sloughed off 17 lbs in dead skin, cuticle meat, and unwanted hair, you start to notice them noticing you. Them being The Boys. Screw love. Ass is in the air…

Star Search: SLUT MACHINE

Whip-smart Williamsburger Tracie Egan started her blog following that age-old wisdom—write what you know. What Egan, the girl behind the massively popular onedatatime.com, knows a lot about is dick. The sailor-mouthed coquette also knows a thing or two about feminism, cooking, comic books…

Star Search: RYE RYE

B’More on the Dancefloor
Ryeisha Berrain’s drop on DJ/producer Blaqstarr’s track “Shake it To The Ground” turned the Baltimore high schooler, better known as Rye Rye, into a club sensation. In no time, bloggers were blowing her up and shortly thereafter, M.I.A. came-a-callin’…

BALLS!: Bowling with The Donnas

The Donnas are awesome. For cryin’ out loud, they’ve been around for 15 years, released seven albums, and unleashed their latest, Bitchin’, on their own label called Purple Feather Records. It’s particularly nuts when you consider that this most rockingest foursome…

Rock Royalty: Her Highness Jennifer Herrema

Jennifer Herrema is taller than I’d expected. Skinny-legged and rough, with her head swaddled in a gargantuan fur hood. She’s androgynous and weird looking. She’s also indisputably and overwhelmingly sexy. Unnervingly sexy. Decades of partying are written on the 36-year-old’s face. Not that she looks…

Fashion: La La Land

Lady of Leisure

Fashion: Angel Dust

ACID QUEEN

Star Search: Mc Lars

Dork Rap

Hollywood-based boy genius MC Lars gets to be the new spokesman for nerd core rap music. This is because he is intelligent, talented, and attractive—the three traits by which all hip-hop is judged in the whole wide world. Nerd core is a subgenre of rap distinguished by its’ geek-centric subject matter and heavy hitters that include MC Frontalot, Optimus Rhyme, and MC Chris.

Star Search: Krysten Ritter

Scene Stealing Beauty

Krysten Ritter, the statuesque actress is looking fierce today (her words, not mine). She does look striking though, walking along Williamsburg, Brooklyn’s Bedford Avenue in a body-length black petticoat that covers a crimson tunic. “I’m really country, though,” she says, despite the minxy duds. “Watch, I’ll show you.” On cue, Ritter enters a local watering hole, Greenpoint Tavern, and orders a bottle-and-a-half of Budweiser served in a massive Styrofoam cup. “See, I’m so simple. No martinis for me.”

Fashion Graveyard: Pop a Cap

Name: Fitted Hat
Case No.: 008
Date of Death: Summer 2008
Cause of Death: Keeping it real

A.D.H.D: Fry Right

WTF TO DO WITH USED OIL

Us food monsters like to deep fry things: tater tots, donuts, pizza, tater tots wrapped in pizza. We like to use either peanut oil or lard because one has a higher smoke point than canola, and the other is so delicious…

The Gospel According to YASI: Hipster Hazards

Just so you know, I suck at being didactic. Advice column notwithstanding, I don’t actually believe myself fit to tell others what to do. But because my delightful Missbehave colleague Matthew is on hiatus, and I was actually a little worn out from demeaning myself for your amusement, I decided to write this article instead. That said, here’s what I think:…